Saturday, December 27, 2008


I hate the 'what if you are in xyz situation. Who would you chose? How would you react?' I hate this to no extent. Firstly, you can never say how or what will you do because our reactions also depend on the circumstances that surround it. Secondly, it is the MOST SILLY way of asking your boyfriend or girlfriend to express their love for you. It just goes on to show how insecure are you about his/er love for you.

G for the past few days has been repeatedly asking me in different ways What will I do if he dies? To be honest. I am so fucking emotional when it comes to him that my tears are in a 'on your mark-get set go' position all the time. He says it. I can cry. I will not. I have an ego. And most importantly, it irritates me. Irritates me to the extent that I can get into the phone and kill him. Huh.

Finally, today I just told him. What is this fucking way of expecting me to say tons of 'I Love you too much G that I can not live with out you shit. My life will be incomplete without you. I will miss you so much that I will not let you go and live like a zinda laash', like those typical insecure lover boys. Oh Freak! And then, "There is a fundamental difference between them and me."
"A lover boy would ask - "What will you do if I die? Will you miss me?
I am asking - "What will you do when I die? How fast will you find another guy?"
Typical of G.
"Okay tell me. If you were not in a relationship with me and you had to get laid with either some lover boy types or me. Who would you go to?"
Arrgghh. God G!
"I am not in a relationship?"
"No. You are not."
"Mmmmmm. Depends."
"Depends? Saali Rand"
"Depends. Bloody here I am there as an option and she is saying 'DEPENDS'."
"Yeah. Depends on whether I am in the mood to 'make ..."
"No. Just sex."
"I do not know. Depends ya."
"Saali Randi"
"You Rand"
"You Randi"
"You Slut."
"You Randi"
"No. You."
"You Randi L"
"No. You you you you."
"No. You you you you you you you you."
"OK Fine ya. ME."
"Yes. You Randi"
"G, now you can stop. Stop disrespecting me."
"Oh! Disrespecting."
"Yes. I will hang up."
"Yeah Right."
More Silence.
"You know L, who is the culprit in all our stupid situational conversations and our silly You-No.You fights? It is our FREE PHONE. Right now, if it was not for the free phone, we would have spoken like, "I Love you I Love you. OK Bye. I got no balance in my phone.""
Mind you this is keeping the phone away and controlling a fit.
"This free phone should be blamed for all. There would have been no free phone and no time to have conversations like these."
"Finally, she laughs."
"I have been laughing for the past five minutes."
And we keep laughing.

Love 'n' Peace.


Saturday, December 20, 2008

Missing G!! :(

I am missing G terribly. He send a mess. in the afternoon "Freak! I never thought ill mess u right after v have spoken n tell u this but i guess i want u to know this more clearly... That i really genuinely like u...And that i am always happy n smiley when i am WITH u...what the fuck im missing u already...Really wanted to talk but i understand d situation completely...Just want u to have a great day tomorrow n may tomorrow b d beginnin of realising all ur dreams n reaching d zenith of success...Good night." I had sent this mess. to G when we were in our 'I like you' phase and had not started seeing each other yet. Next day was his first day to office and we could not talk because of his mother and grandmother insisting him to go to sleep. The way he immediately obeyed despite wanting to talk to me, was damn cute.

We always told each other how much we like each other's company but did not want to take the plunge right away. Infact, when we had started talking, we did not even start with the intention of giving it a shot. It just happened. We spoke. We spoke for unending hours. Had our morning tea and then slept. When we knew we liked each other. We wanted it to work. We still wanted to take it slow until one day I just said the obvious 'I Love You' and he said 'I Love you too' immediately and as naturally as we say it now. "I said 'I Love You too' as if you would have changed your mind the next moment", he laughed later. Ofcourse I asked him why did he not formally propose to me. He said, "I wanted to say I Love You to you when I would be sure you would say it back too." All of this happened within 20 days of us talking over the phone. This was fast.

When I look back, sometimes it feels so fresh and sometimes like we have been together forever. I want to be with him forever. I want to drag him to the Doctor when his nose bleeds. He is a fool. His nose bled severely yesterday morning and he still has not gone to a Doc. I wish I was with him in the same city. I could cook for him every time he is hungry and lazy. I could just have him beside me on the bed and tell me stupid tales that make me laugh so that I'd forget my killing stomach cramps.

Today, I just fell in love with him all over again. He called. We spoke. I was in a terrible state because of my first day of periods. I hate being a woman these five days of the month. I hate the stomach cramps that come with it. It is really bad today. Was lying all day with a hot water bottle. And just to cheer me up he started narrating some random incidents. Stupid incidents that cracked me up. He did it all so that I would forget my pain for atleast five minutes if not more. I want to hug him and cry. That is how much I love him. And that is how much he loves me. (Touch Wood.)

It is very likely that instead of shifting to G's city, I may go to another continent for a year, next year. I know it is going to be extremely hard for him. He hates having a long distance relationship. He feels I prefer it this way. I confirmed it to him. But no G, I love you too much. Sometimes it gets really hard for me too. I want you with me, physically. Small things like just reading and watching T.V., are things I want to do with you. Why I say I do not mind long distance because it would never lessen my love for you. Because I know I will be with you ultimately, forever.

The only time in my life I believe in the word 'forever', is when I speak of G n I together.

I Love you, FOREVER.
Missing you crazily.

A Big Hug to you.
A Kiss on your forehead.

Love 'n' Peace.



Got this one from D's blog. Please fill it for me too in the comment box. It would be really sweet of you.

1. Who are you?

2. Are we friends?

3.Something I have and you want?

4.Give me a nick name and explain me why u picked it?

5.Describe me in one word?

6.What was your first impression of me?

7.Do you still think that way about me now?

8.What reminds you of me?

9.If you could ever give me one thing,what it could be?

10.How well you know me?

11.How do you see me in future?

12.Ever wanted to tell me anything ,but couldn't?

13.Are you going to put this on your blog and going to see what I say about you?

14. (I am adding this one.) A song you want to dedicate to me. Why?


Looking forward to your responses.

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Luscious Sealed Lips and The Sassy Spinster had announced a Singles Awarness Blogathon Week, from February 9th'09 to February 13th '09 to mark the celebration of the Singles Awareness Day on February 14th'09.

The Final participants of the S.A.D. Blogathon are Saroj, Single Hilarity, d Rat and Piyush Tainguriya, along with my co partner, Chrys, who updated her blog everyday through out the week.

Please do visit their blogs and read their special and interesting S.A.D. posts on Singleton.

Thank you!