Tuesday, September 30, 2008

What a pain being a Woman is!

Eid is on the second now. Already a national holiday. No extra holiday :(. Not like I care much but I am traveling on the second night, will have to leave mom alone on Eid night. Not feeling good about it at all. So bad that thought of getting my ticket canceled, plus I am feeling guilty too (Lying to mom and going to a different city) I have not lied to her about even the biggest of things. This is my first time. I am scared. Nervous. And then, just way too many bomb blasts, so what if they are minor, a blast is a blast! If I did not have K's ticket with me, I would have probably gotten mine canceled long back, but since I have hers and no time to courier, I will have to go now (What a pain no? Devilish smile). Every time I feel guilty or scared, I call K, she knows how to handle me and so I am fine now. I guess I was just not in a good mood in the evening.

Mom and I left for the hair cut I wanted to treat her for. She wanted a hair cut and I got a free coupon for it so I gifted her that, hence it became my treat. :) I wanted to get my hands and underarms waxed. My underarms look like a man's, who has not shaved ever in his life! And the people were so busy there that we came back with just a very sexy haircut and clean eyebrows/upper lips.

It is such a pain being a woman sometimes. The periods, the hair removal, pregnancies - SO MUCH we have to pay for being a temptress! Sigh! Yesterday P and I were broke so could not go to our typical hang out for hours of conversation. We went to her home and after a long time I ate home cooked food, simple Indian food. Delicious! Nothing like it! I ate so much I wanted to start snoring at P's place and not go to my own place. P is extremely excited about my 'lovers trip'. Strange. She calls it the 'mission trip'. Really confused this time. "No P. What makes you think I am going there with a mission?"
"Ahem ahem ahem!"
"Come on. There is going to be so much of sex!"
"Yeah P! So?", with an extremely confused expression.
"Okay... Yeah. You had always been so open about this. You knew you would do it before marriage.... You know... you were never like me. So averse to it and then gradually opening up to it..."
"Yeah. I guess..."
Silence. Not a comfortable one. She has something going in her mind.
"Why don't you? What is stopping you?"
Deep breathe and "Alright! I have an honest confession to make."
Is it about me? As in... does she have something to say about my sex life? Like maybe I should also not get into it before marriage or something? WTF! How can I be SO self obsessed!
"I am conscience about my body... You know till the upper body it is fine. But I am not okay below the belly. My abdomen is so heavy! My thighs... They are thundering. Okay?"
"P! Relax. To be honest. I was conscience too, initially. But when you are in that moment, the body does not matter!"
She still did not look convinced.
"Look P! I am fatter than you! But once it happens. It does not matter. Even to you guy!"
"No. We are the same size, just that you are taller and have a broader bone structure..."
"No P! I know my body. My lower abdomen is like some huge saucer."
"No R!"
"No P!"
And the never ending womanly comparisons 'You are better' shall continue until eternity unless the topic changes. And thankfully it was P who did it.
"...but it really is okay. Your body type does not matter P!"
"You know... I am not even shaving my under legs because I do not want him going down on me."
"Even if you do not shave he can go down on you, unless he specifically prefers that way."
"You said it hurts alot and you walk with your legs apart for a full day."
"Yeah! But that is when you use a hair removing cream. I have never tried shaving."
"I am scared, actually. It bleeds."
"WTF! What are you talking?"
"Yeah. When I had my stones' operation na. The nurse was shaving my stomach and my pussy (Ggggrrrr... I do not understand WHY does a woman call her VAGINA - A PUSSY!! It is called a fucking VAGINA!! Pussy is for 'dirty talking'!!) and all of a sudden I started bleeding.... It is such a sensitive area."
"Why don't you try trimming? Atleast that would help in lessening the mess down there."
Now! Sh said something really dumb. Thankfully I do not remember, but I remember proudly saying, "I never keep mine for too long so I would not know. I find it extremely irritating that is why I clean myself regularly. I like it clean."

The conversation, by now had shifted to Babies and Pregnancies. Yeah! She was telling me of some clip she saw that had shown the delivery of a baby. "It is so painful that if you watch it, you would not want to give birth to a baby." I would! Infact, I went out for a dinner party recently, where I saw this oh-so-adorably-cute baby, Indian father and a German mother. My God! The baby girl was such a delight to watch and the mother was so happy with her 9 month old. They responded to each other in ways that looked so out of the world, as if naturally made just for that mother-daughter. It was such an amazing feeling watching them. I was happy my elder sister was not there. She has been married for 8 years now and she had wanted a child immediately but unfortunately some medical problems with both, her and her spouse has made this difficult for them and she is still without a baby. She craves and dreams of on day and night. You can see it in her eyes. Its like each on of us are born to do something in life. She was born to be my mother (She is 9 years elder to me) and her ofocurse her own child's. I want a baby too, later in life, ofcourse. When I saw that cute baby, all I wanted to do was call G and tell him, "I want a baby as cute as him." That would actually mean, our baby looking North Eastern when the parents are from north and south.

Not much has happened in these two days. Some cramps, lots of eating, all the more bloating, Eid preparations, traveling issues - to go/not to go. Mom was even asking for my work place's contact details. Fuck! What will I give her if she is serious!? Thankfully, I ignored and she did not ask again, but two more full days to go and she could ask again. Infact, she will! But today was fun with her. It was fun getting scared of her after a long time. What happened is that after we left for our salon and shopping, we came back after over two hours only to see the main door and gate absolutely open. Mom literally screamed. I wondered why. "The maid is there no. Why are you screaming?" "Did you leave the doors like this when you came out of the house?" "Err..uumm.. yeaah.." Fachaak! I got pasted, royally! Apparently, the maid had left before me and I was supposed to lock the house. I ran to th computer room to find shelter and remained there hours after mom was done screaming 'about me' to others. I knew, this moment onwards until the next few days she will sing loudly with melodrama involved about my 'carelessness'. Moms Love ranting about their kids. New moms can not talk enough about the developments in their babies and mothers of growing children can not stop complaining. Bing a mother should become a paid job. God should offer free shopping vouchers, single holiday trips to the most exotic places in the world, customized husbands, whose settings can be changed as per taste and requirement, a mute button facility for crying babies, cribbing friends, and irritating aunties who would give you 1001 fr advices on what should the baby eat/what should you eat/what should your husband eat/what should your dog eat/what should your ailing parents eat, but what the hell do they eat that they never lose weight despite their 'diets and exercising'. Gosh! God is so cruel sometimes!

Tomorrow no Eid so I will go and get my waxing done. I might get some mehndi done on my palms too. Lets see... Really sleepy now. Yawn!

Good Night!


Love 'n' Peace.


Mystique Wanderer said...

wait till you hear what we guys worry about the first time around...its equally bad the tension...

but like u said it...in the heat of the moment...the misplaced flab doesnt really matter...among other things that dont...

though frankly i never heard of someone who doesnt like their partner going down on them...its like somebody having problems wid lazy fun :P :P

Kenneth said...

customized husbands, whose settings can be changed as per taste and requirement

As if "easy manipulation" wasn't good enough

Crazy Diamond said...

aaa! I hate waxing too..what a pain! but it feels good once done.. so it' worth the pain.

i'm lucky my guy prefers it ~natural~ but i do trim otherwise wearing cute little panties is not fun with stuff coming out of it @!

Hmmm, i can understand you feeling guilty about hiding this thing from your mom and going on Eid.. you could bluedart the ticket to your friend, reaches in a day.. Or go. Actually, now that you've got the wax - might as well go!

haha have fun

Luscious Sealed Lips said...

Dear Mystique Wanderer,

I am glad it is, otherwise it would be so unfair.

A confirmation is always good. :)

It really is strange! Lol! Lazy fun!


Luscious Sealed Lips said...

Dear Kenneth,



Luscious Sealed Lips said...

Dear Crazy Diamond,

Completely worth the pain!

I do not think my guy has issues with it but I definitely do.

I am packed now. :)



omg... u write wih so much honesty...!!!!


Keshi said...

ty for stopping by my blog!

Being a woman is all abt that and ranting too ;-)

I wudnt mind hvn a rented husband, wut say?


Luscious Sealed Lips said...

Dear Keshi,

Rented husbands is a good idea. We could change them as per convenience too.


Luscious Sealed Lips said...

Dear Rinzu,

That is all I want to be - Honest!


Anonymous said...

lol! too true..well atleast was stayin away from my folks my first time...so dint have too much of a guilt trip...was apprehensive tho.. :P

Luscious Sealed Lips said...

Dear Eternalunderprformer,

Nice to hear that.

I guess it is just the 'I-am-feeling-scared-because-it-is-my-first-time'.


Keshi said...

lolz yes!

And if the rent is too high, we can move out.


Luscious Sealed Lips said...

Dear Keshi,



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